#inspired by pinterest

[mayflora-18]

Incorrect CoD Quotes #9

Price: There’s something wrong with the kid.

Laswell: Like what?

Price: *holds up a photo of a spider*

Roach: Ew.

Price: *holds up a photo of a cockroach*

Roach: Me.

Price: *holds up a photo of a lady bug*

Roach: *tips his helmet* Evening, ma’am.

Price: You see what I mean?

———

Roach: *sneaks into the barracks at 2am*

Price: *turns in a swivel chair* Care to to tell me where you were?

Roach: I was with… uh… Ghost!

Ghost: *also turns in swivel chair* Care to tr- *keeps spinning* uh Boss- I can’t stop the chair-

Roach: I meant… I was with Garrick.

Gaz: *turns on the light* Honestly Sanderson, you would think Roach would know how to be sneakier.

Roach:

———

Price, walking in: The training grounds are closed because of the ice storm.

Soap: Great! No training!

Soap: *looks out the window* Is Ghost still walking to the training grounds?

Soap: *opens window* HEY DIPSHIT, TRAINING’S CANCELLED!

Ghost: *looks around, confused* GOD?!

———

Ghost: Remember what I taught you.

Farah: The quickest way to a man’s heart is through the fourth and fifth ribs.

Alex: Ghost no!

———

Ghost: *can’t sleep because of nightmares*

Ghost: Listen to your therapist they said.

Ghost: You’ve been through a lot of trauma they said.

Ghost: *throws pillow* WELL YOUR BREATHING EXERCISES AREN’T WORKING NOW, ARE THEY DEBORAH!!

———

Rudy: I have a bad feeling about this.

Alejandro: What do you mean?

Rudy: Don’t you ever get that little voice in your head that tells you if something will get you into trouble?

Alejandro: No?

Rudy: That actually explains so much.

(This could work between Rudy and Soap too, honestly).

———

Nikolai: Physically I’m here but spiritually I’m lying in a Waffle House parking lot somewhere in rural Kentucky, slowly bleeding out from several stab wounds.

Sherlock: Mood.

———

Roach: I want to be a caterpillar.

Sherlock: Explain?

Roach: Eat a lot, sleep for a while. Wake up beautiful.

Sherlock: You know that they have a lifespan of, like, two weeks right?

Roach: That’s another highlight.

Soap: ROACH NO-

———

Sherlock: How do people just stay motivated their entire lives? What drives you? I got out of bed once and I’ve been exhausted ever since.

Ghost: You need to learn to hate life to the point where you want revenge on existence itself.

The rest of the 141:

Nikolai: *nods in agreement*

Roach: *furiously takes notes*

———

Soap: Is e seo do choire gu lèir.

Ghost: I know, I know.

Gaz: You know Gaelic??

Ghost: No, I just know the phrase “this is all your fault” in every language he speaks.

———

Roach: Sleeping is nice because you’re not exactly dead and you’re not awake so it’s a win-win situation.

Sherlock: It’s like being dead without the commitment.

Nikolai: An open relationship with death.

Farah: Death with benefits.

Ghost: An every night stand.

Meanwhile, everyone else in the background: *absolutely horrified*

———

*1am at 141 base*

Soap: If I drink Red Bull and NyQuil will I stay up or pass out?

Ghost: …Get off the fridge and go to bed like a normal human being.

*Later*

Ghost: SHERLOCK I HAVE A QUESTION!

Sherlock: Ghost what the fuck it’s 3am.

[pyromaniacbibliophile]

Albus put down the book very slowly. Scorpius looked at him with mild concern. “Albus?” 

He didn’t listen, instead he got up, walked out of the library, and screamed. Then he came back in. Madam Pince looked down her nose at him, so he grinned cheerfully and sat down next to Scorpius. 

“Al, what was that for?” 

Wordlessly, Albus pushed the book over to Scorpius, gesturing at two consecutive chapters. Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore, read the first. The second, Severus Tobias Snape. Scorpius read the entries quickly, the advantages of being a fast reader. He laughed. 

“Shut up!” Albus whispers, poking him in the side. 

“I mean you have to admit, it’s funny.”

“No it really isn’t! Dad’s the bloody Man-Who-Conquered, you’d think he’d know how to name a child!” He whisper-shouted.

“Would you like a quill and parchment?” Scorpius asked innocently. 

Albus glared. “Yes.” 

In the end, the letter read

Dear Mum and Dad, I’m in the library,  having just read a book about previous heads of Hogwarts Written by Uncle Nev and Auntie Luna And I would just like to ask one thing Are you fucking serious? I demand a name-change now please Anything, literally anything else Dobby Kreature Potter, for all I care Sorry for swearing, but just Bloody hell, what were you thinking Love, Norbert Fang Potter, or something

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ron laughed. “You have to admit, mate, naming your son after the bloke who raised you to die and the twit who bullied us for our entire school and told Moldy-wart the Prophecy was a little bit stupid, wasn’t it.” 

“It was symbolic!” Harry protested. 

“Your first son you called James Sirius. Alright, bit of a heavy legacy, but I can see the reasoning. Your daughter, Lily Luna. The same. But why, oh why, did you call Al, Albus Severus? Mate, honestly. It’s not like we have a shortage of slightly nicer dead friends and family to name children as, is it? Or alive, you called Lils Luna, after all! I despair. It’s a miracle that you didn’t name Teddy, or else he might have ended up as Remus Peter Lupin-Potter! Or why not skip the subtleties and call him Peter Bellatrix Scabbers!” 

Harry winced. In retrospect, true. “... Regulus Minerva Potter?”

“Alright, a little bit better, but just a small thought. This is your chance to give one of your children a name that doesn’t have a previous owner. Just a thought, mind.” Ron added.

“Tom?” 

There was silence. Ron seemed dumbstruck at his friend's utter idiocy. “Harry. Mate. Please, please, tell me you see the issue with ‘Tom’. Please.” 

“It wasn’t all his fault, really, Dumbledore was a bit of an idiot…” Harry trailed off at the look on Ron’s face. 

“Harry. Your wife was possessed by him for a whole year. He also, under a very stupid alias, did, oh I don’t know, TRY TO KILL YOU FOR YOUR WHOLE LIFE?” 

“And succeeded once.” Harry added helpfully. 

“No. Just no.” 

Harry laughed. That one had been a little bit of a joke, to tell the truth. “Ok. Er- hmm. Your lot and my parents seem to have the monopoly on names, to be fair… Aha! Fleamont Minerva Potter!” 

Ron sighed. “That’s the best we’re going to get, isn’t it? Check with Gin.” 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dear Norbert Fang Potter

We do apologise, it was all your Dad’s idea. I would have been entirely happy never thinking about either Dumbledore or Snape again, to be fair. Thanks to your Uncle Ron preventing Regulus and Tom, we have come up with a different idea. 

How do you feel about Monty Minerva Potter? 

Is school going well, how are your friends?

Mum

and Dad (Who says sorry and admits Albus Severus might have been a mite foolish)

inspired by this pin

[autristic]

Thumbnail refused to load :/

[gianelson]

Lusty Bangel..

I want to see Angel's soul bound or finally receive his redemption so they can have many sexy nights and impromptu sexcapades..then get married and have more sex and then create little broody vampires..

[just-a-hooman64]

I have no excuse for this, I could not resist this suggestion and I am blaming my friend for sending me the reference image from Pinterest reference + other versions under the cut

[lazulixir]

More practice with Pinterest inspirations - today we learn about the joys and torments of sheer fabric!

[brxwneyezzz]

a lil big illustration i did

sky.

[maracapri]

[demondog27]

Max Mayfield

[ablogformyart]

miscellaneous: phone charms ↳ inspired by HoneyyCrystalPicks on etsy (mar 2024)

[classic-storydragon]

Day 3: Ritzy

Gunther leans against the wall in boredom. Sure, there are plenty of pretty ladies attending the Royal Ball, but none of them seem captivating enough to draw his attention. None, that is, until a red-head angel in a golden gown enters the ballroom.

[undermoonsblog]

[incorrectjane-andthedragon]

*modern AU* *Magnus is on the phone with Gunther* *Gunther is an adult* Magnus: So, how much government information are you currently privy to, in your position? Gunther: Why do you ask, Father? Magnus: Oh, I just want to know... Magnus: WHY I'VE BEEN DEEMED A FLIGHT RISK AND AM NO LONGER ALLOWED ON PLANES?! Gunther: You're going to have to ask someone else about that. Magnus: How can you not know?! Gunther, softly: I have my theories but if I list the entirety of your rap sheet all we'll be here all day. Magnus: What was that? Gunther: I didn't say anything. Oh no, your signal's bad, you're breaking up. Magnus: *spluttering* Gunther: Bye, nice talking to you. *hangs up*

[mollyjimbly]

clay tic-tac-toe

was thinking primary colours for this

O's will be blue X's will be red tray will be yellow with green lines :3

[starrysharks]

ghanaian miku

[must-have-been-thewind]

cigarettes and melons

I tried to draw the dark parts of the melon light but I don't know how well that worked

Sketches I uploaded to this day